Not your problem!

Being negative is a choice! People choose to be that way, because they are looking for two things: attention and someone to blame! Regardless of their antics, don’t alter your character to mirror theirs! Be the bigger person and walk away, even though you’ll be alone! We all have choices, and how people go about making theirs, is not your problem! Besides, if they’re unhappy, they can choose to change it. If not, then they should at least stop talking about it! Live your life, even if they hate seeing you enjoy it!

Until next time my NOTE takers!

Writefully yours,

Deetra La’Rue

Walk….even if you’re alone!

I’m not a real big exercise enthusiast, but whenever I do work out, I’d rather walk more than anything. The gym bores me, but walking gives me clarity and peace of mind. I’m able to empty the mental garbage that has been dumped on me throughout the day, and process how well work may or may not have gone, without my thoughts trying to compete with the noisy machines or constant grunts of the weightlifters.

I used to have a walking buddy, but I now walk alone, because it’s what works best for me. At first, I missed the conversations we had, and the friendly competitions we often found ourselves in, by trying to see whose day was more worse than the other’s. However, the absence of chatter doesn’t bother me anymore, because I’m more in tune and attentive to what He is trying to say to me. My listening skills have sharpened and so have I.

A lot of times, you’re going to find yourself in situations that require you to “walk”. You’ve got to learn to “walk” away from negativity, and anything or anyone that is a threat to your peace of mind! Granted when you do make the decision to be the bigger person, you will be walking alone, because there aren’t many people who chose to take the high road. I used to be one of them, and always felt as though I “had to have the last say”.

However, now I’ve chosen to walk away from mess and all the negative thoughts that could harvest, as a result of me listening to garbage! Sometimes, it’s not easy, but it’s what’s best, not just for you, but the other person as well. Maybe by them seeing you not engage and instead choosing to walk, they’ll do the same!

Until next time my NOTE takers!

Writefully yours,

Deetra La’Rue

Have a GREAT day!

Every morning like clock work, when I step into my office, I sit down and immediately prepare my TDL (to do list) for the day. I place a check box next to each agenda I plan to complete, and check them off as I go. This may come as a surprise to others, but the first box that I have to check off is, the one that says, “Have a GREAT day”! Yes, I purposely tell myself to “have a great day”, and believe it or not, it’s THE most important bullet on my list.

I aspire to live and lead my life with positivity, and if I’m not giving myself positive affirmations as such, then I allow others to “readjust my thermostat”. Immediately, my day goes from a cool 69, to a blistering 100 degrees, because I’ve allowed something someone said or did to get to me. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve had to fight someone just to regain control of my thermostat. It’s easy to become distracted or allow something to disrupt your day, when you don’t start off positive.

Self-care is extremely important to me, because if I don’t take care of myself, then how am I going to be of service to someone else? If that’s the case, I wouldn’t be able to complete my job duties successfully, and I simply can’t have that happen, when so many people rely and depend on me. Besides, when my day is not going right, neither is my attitude! I know some people are probably saying and thinking, “It doesn’t take all that”, but it does when I want to be my best self!

What are you telling yourself? Do you think or speak of yourself with positivity? Or, are you waiting on someone else to be your “hype man”?

Until next time my NOTE takers!

Writefully yours,

Deetra La’Rue

I feel good when I “feel good” about me

Everyday I try to give myself positive affirmations, because if I relied on others to do it for me, my self-esteem would be pretty much non-existent. I make sure I reassure myself that I am beautiful, good enough and more than worth the wait! To be totally honest, I don’t feel good, when I don’t “feel good” about me.

I’ve probably mentioned this a few times in past posts, but I used to look to others for validation or to reaffirm what I thought, I thought (no typo) about myself. However, when the validations weren’t pouring in, I started bleeding out. I felt hurt and offended almost, that nobody seemed to feel the way about me, the way I felt about me.  Am I making sense or causing confusion?

Whichever the case, I thought what I needed from them (whoever they were) was what I needed for me. Essentially speaking, no matter how many compliments I got, praises or “Amen”, it didn’t make me feel good, because I didn’t feel good about me. I know deep down inside, I have a lot of attributes and plenty to offer, but I had a hard time believing and seeing it.

Rather than throw another pity party for myself, my positive affirmations got stronger and so did I. I had to learn that I couldn’t rely on anyone to make me feel good about myself…..that’s my job! I couldn’t expect anyone to love me “for me” (not speaking in the context of who I am)……that’s my job! I couldn’t expect anyone to do anything for me, that I knew I needed to be doing for myself……again, that’s my job!

When I started to feel good about myself, overall, I felt good! When I let go of what I thought I needed from people or to hear from them, I felt even better! When I let go of the thought of letting go and “JUST LET GO”, I felt my absolute BEST! A handful of regrets later, I STILL feel good! I was so inspired to transfer what I had done for me to help others, that I created a “Positive Affirmation (I AM MORE THAN….) Board for my students.

On the board, there are blank balloons, and anytime they are feeling weighed down with something or someone, they are to write it on the balloon and thumb tack it on the board. In essence, they are releasing the balloon/s (the negatives) and giving themselves positive affirmation/reassurance that they are enough and “more than” whatever they write inside the balloons.

Have you “released” any balloons lately?

Until next time my Note takers!

Writefully yours,

Deetra La’Rue

Words are weapons too!

“Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words can never hurt me”. I can still hear the chant echoed by my elementary school classmates. However, truth of the matter, words do hurt! A lot of power lie within the tongue, so when speaking to someone or about someone, use caution with your words.

I’m pretty sure we’ve all heard the saying, “If you don’t have anything nice to say, then don’t say anything at all”. People need to understand that just because you have a negative thought or the right to “speak your mind”, doesn’t mean you should say whatever comes to mind. Some people are incredibly sensitive, and even the smallest thing you say, can offend them.

I used to be the type of person that “whatever came up, came out”, but when I realized how damaging my words were, I quickly did away with them. I wanted to use my words to inspire and be uplifting, not insulting. Besides, my careless use of words to retaliate against others temporarily made me feel better, but left them with everlasting pain.

Rather than keep people down with my words, I chose to raise them up instead of lowering them. I had to (eventually) learn that every action doesn’t require a reaction or rebuttal. So now, when people speak negatively towards me, I let them!

It took me a while to be able to take the high road, I’ll admit. I had to remember that hurt people, hurt people. However, don’t become one of those people! Always turn the other cheek and walk away! Be careful of your thoughts, because they turn into hurtful words and ultimately bad actions. Just think about it, if you have to ask yourself whether or not you should say something, or question if anyone would get offended, it’s best to just keep quiet!

Until next time Note takers!

Writefully yours,

Deetra La’Rue

NO WHITE FLAGS!

“It’s okay to fall down sometimes, just don’t stay there”! ~Deetra La’Rue

People are so quick to throw in the “white towel”, because it’s so much easier to just quit.  However, what they fail to realize is, the moment they give up, they forfeit their hopes and dreams.  Hope nowadays, seem to be the very thing a lot of people don’t have.  As I mentioned in my book, “Let’s TALK”, so many people are okay with falling down and remaining there, because it’s too much of a hassle for them to get back up again. 

Rather than use their strength to get up, they lie there, because they feel as though their situation isn’t going to get any better….which is something they don’t want to face anyway.  Every body has had their fair share of failures, and will probably expect more throughout the course of their lifetime. We all know it doesn’t matter how many times you fall down, as long as you get back up.  For some, getting back up is almost instant and adds fuel to their fire, which gives them the drive they need to succeed. 

For others, falling down just confirms the idea that they aren’t meant to succeed, so what’s the use in trying, right? #Wrong! Our mind wants us to believe that when we aren’t experiencing the success that we envisioned so quickly, we need to “wave our white flags”, because we’ll never achieve our goals.  That’s the problem, too many of us are still waiting on the microwave to go off at any moment now, because it’s much quicker than allowing our hard work to bake, while we sit through and enjoy the process. 

That’s it! Nobody wants to endure the process, they only want the results.  But, how can you honestly appreciate and enjoy your success, if you didn’t do anything to get it? If anything, it should make your success that much sweeter to have, because you know of all the hard work, sweat (stress, yes that too) and tears you put behind it.  Nobody ever said it would be easy, but rest assured, it’ll be worth it in the end! 

So, resist the urge to “throw in the towel” and “wave the white flag”! Success is hard work, and again, it doesn’t equate to how much money you have, so stop beating yourself up about it! Remember, “It’s okay to fall down sometimes, just don’t stay there”! 

Writefully yours, 

Deetra La’Rue