Rejuvenated

On Friday, February 21, 2020, I had my final session of Therapy! My Therapist called me on Monday, February 24, 2020 to confirm what I had felt for months, and to my surprise, my response was much more different from what I’d thought it would be. I was extremely happy and relieved, but apart of me was a little anxious. I had enjoyed our therapeutic relationship for so long, that I thought I’d be empty without it. But, I reminded myself, that although she wouldn’t be there, the techniques she gave me would. Not only that, the very thoughts I had fought for 14 months to rid myself of, were trying to make a re-appearance. One of the worst things it told me was, “Don’t get too happy, because you’re going to f****** up”. I momentarily entertained my anxiety, until I remembered that I had been equipped with the weapons and tools to fight back. I uttered, “Although you’re strong, I have become much more stronger than you, so don’t you f***** up”!

I was so proud of myself for recognizing what I was up against, but more importantly, happy that I took a stance and didn’t allow my thoughts to get the best of me, because I had worked too hard do what was best for me! I’ll admit, those were the most grueling 14 months ever, but I am so thankful that I ignored the stigma and listened to all the signs of destruction. I lived in agony and silence for 21 years, because I was too afraid to ask for something my pain had been telling me I needed, which was help! However, I thought my medication and writing would eventually take care of what I had been feeling, so I really didn’t see the need in paying someone to hear my problems. Although those things provided me with temporary relief, they couldn’t heal me the way Therapy did. Going forward, I know I will no doubt run into more speed bumps, but it’s nothing I can’t “get over”. I feel amazing, like a brand new woman, but most of all, I feel rejuvenated!

Image result for help hotline text
Image courtesy of afsp.org/resources

Until next time my NOTE takers!

Writefully yours,

Deetra La’Rue

Enjoy

Have you ever been so happy and excited about the great things that are taking place in your life, that you can barely wait to see what happens next? Do you find yourself rushing to get to another adventure, although you’re not finished with the one you’re on? Great! Because, I thought I was the only one. The last few years have been pretty amazing for me, and I couldn’t be more happier. However, I couldn’t be more impatient either, because I’m constantly in a hurry to get to the next phase of my journey. Yet, I have to question myself, “Are you really enjoying the journey”? After all, how can I be, if my mind has left the “party”, only to plan the upcoming one. Rather than “bolting” like Usain to the next level, I’m just going to sit still and enjoy the fruits of my labor!

Don’t get so caught up living your life as though you are in a race. Slow down and appreciate the small things, as you look forward to the bigger ones to come.

Until next time my NOTE takers!

Writefully yours,

Deetra La’Rue

Taking it back

You have something that belongs to me. I’m not sure why you took it, when it wasn’t yours to begin with. However, I need it back! It’s been gone for so long, that I forgot what it felt like. I’ve become so weak, because it held all my strength. No matter what I was going through, it always reminded me that everything was going to be okay. To be honest, I didn’t know that I could miss something so much, until I was without it. I’ve lost my mind, because I no longer have peace of mind. So, hand it over, because I’m taking it back!

Stop letting thieves steal from you. You saw what it did to your “joy”.

Until next time my NOTE takers!

Writefully yours,

Deetra La’Rue

Robbing Joy

Three years ago, I was held hostage and I thought of all the things I had to lose

I wanted to escape and run for it, but I was afraid to make any sudden moves

I was nervous, scared and terrified, because I thought my life was done

Little did I know it was far from over, and things had only just begun

My days went from sunny and bright, and darkness slowly seeped in

I didn’t understand the sudden sadness, no matter how hard I tried to comprehend

For months my mood was dangerously low and I couldn’t get out of that rut

I tried all I could to feel better, but there was no way I could pull myself up

I was down for a very long time, which was all apart of it’s ploy

I lost myself when comparison came, and robbed me of my joy

We all know that “comparison is the thief of joy”, so guard yours at all times! It’s so easy for us to compare our lives to someone else’s. We can be the happiest person in the world, and then money, status, or someone’s relationship will cause it all to change. Suddenly, our contentment cease to exist and what we have no longer looks good to us, so we start to lust after things that was not meant for us. However, if God intended for you to have what your neighbor does, don’t you think He would’ve blessed you with the same? You have exactly what you need, and I’m sure it’s more than enough. “Be appreciative of what you have, before it becomes what you had” (church sign).

Until next time my NOTE takers!

Writefully yours,

Deetra La’Rue

Sunshine and Lemons

I don’t always have good days, but I still try to find the light, despite the darkness. For the past few days, I was a conqueror, but today I suddenly feel conquered. I’m not sure what has overcome me, but I know what the outcome will be…..and that’s me choosing to rise, in spite of the fall. I could very well stay down, but I know the joys of being up! In life, you’re going to experience some things that brings you sunshine and lemons. Regardless of what those situations are, you have the choice to either be happy or bitter!

Until next time my NOTE takers!

Writefully yours,

Deetra La’Rue

Nobody like you

“If everybody could do it, they would”! Have you ever wondered why you, of ALL people, were blessed with the gifts and talents that you have? Maybe you’ve pondered or perhaps even questioned, “Why me, not them”? Do you think it’s a coincidence, or do you believe it was on purpose? If you’re anything like me, you chose the latter. Before you were created, God had only ONE blueprint in mind……yours! When He designed you, He didn’t have an example to use, because He knew, there’d be nobody like you!

So often I see/hear of people wanting to be like someone else, which disturbs me, because I can’t think of anyone I’d rather be, other than me! It’s disappointing to say the least, because I can’t begin to tell you all the “Beyonce’s” and “Michael Jackson’s” I’ve seen, but none pale in comparison to the original. Now granted, “imitation is the sincerest form of flattery”, but why try and emulate someone you weren’t created to be? God didn’t create you to mimic someone else, especially when He knows “the original is worth more than the copy”.

Better yet, how do you think it makes Him feel, when you want to be someone other that what He’s created? Whether you know it or not, essentially, you’re telling Him that you don’t value or appreciate who you are, because you feel as though His other creations are worth more than you (just think about it), and are somehow even better. I don’t know about you, but I can’t think of anyone on this planet, that’s better than ME! You can call me arrogant or foolish, but if you’re going to call me anything, I’d rather you call me UNIQUE…because there’s NOBODY LIKE ME!

Until next time my NOTE takers!

Writefully yours,

Deetra La’Rue

A little piece of heaven

So, I’m currently in the “Windy City”, sitting in the Corner Bakery Cafe, eating my “curds and whey”. No, seriously, I’m eating bananas foster pancakes, which are to die for! Chicago is my home for the next 5 days, and as I sit and reflect over my life and all that has happened to me in the past two years, one phrase comes to mind, “A little piece of heaven”.

I can honestly say, I would’ve never imagined this for my life, especially considering the trials and tribulations I was met with early on. I was born below the poverty line and brought up in some undesirable circumstances, so my mindset then was, “Things are never going to get better”. Now twenty (plus) years later, things have been beyond better.

I’m very blessed and fortunate to travel and visit places that have been on my “to do list” for years, and every time I scratch another location off, it feels like “heaven”. “Note takers”, don’t ever stop living, dreaming or stop in the pursuit of your happiness. Things may be rough for you now, but eventually, they’ll get better!

Until next time my NOTE takers!

Writefully yours,

Deetra La’Rue