The End

Wow! It’s amazing how time flies, but what was more amazing, was this year! I’ve been incredibly blessed and very fortunate to have lived through a very good year, despite being in some low points. However, I am happy to say, I’ve experienced more highs than I did lows (especially as it pertains to my mental health), and I am “anxious” (no pun intended) to see how high I soar next year. Regardless of oppositions you may have, you can always choose your ending. I chose to have a good year and I did. Although this year has ended, (more) greater things are beginning! I pray each of you have had a wonderful year, and when you think that you hadn’t, remember, you did, because you’re still here!

Wishing you all a very happy and prosperous New Year!

The End!

Until next time my NOTE takers!

Writefully yours,

Deetra La’Rue

Happy Again: Adding the value back to your life

For a very long time, I felt lost (more like deserted), and I just didn’t know which way to go. If I went left, would things suddenly go “right” for me, or would I continue to wonder around endlessly, looking for my peace and joy…from someone/something else? Like you, I often found myself attaching my happiness to a person, place or thing, but the only thing that could make me happy, was me!

I remember when I was a teenager, I always dreamed of moving to New York, and eventually Atlanta, Georgia, because I thought that’s where my happiness, career, husband, and life was. If nothing or no one could fix what I was going through, then a move across the world would surely do it. I’ve been to Atlanta more times than I can count, and although I was happy when I got there, there was nothing that’d make me happier, than leaving.

The same can be said for New York. I visited NYC for almost a week, and although it was everything that I dreamed it would be and saw on t.v., within 3 days, I was ready to go. I was happy to have experienced the moment, but I was even more happier to get back home to Alabama. I didn’t understand fully that I was attaching my happiness to destinations, until I read an article by Psychologist Dr. Robert Holden, on “Destination Addiction”. He states that, “Destination Addiction is a preoccupation with the idea that happiness is found somewhere else”.

For years, I tied my happiness to different states and people. I foolishly thought a city could give me what I needed, and when I went, it was nothing but a temporarily delight. My happiness faded away, because I was not happy where I was. When I became an adult and entered into my 30’s, I found my happiness, and sad to say, it was in a place that I knew existed, but kept hidden for so long (me)! My happiness brought me joy, peace and more importantly, it added the value back to my life that I had taken away.

Everyone has a choice, so if you’re unhappy, that’s your choice! Quit tying your happiness to places, people or things, because they will disappoint you every time.

Until next time my NOTE takers!

Writefully yours,

Deetra La’Rue

Cinderella ain’t dead!

Keep dreaming….happy endings still come true! ~Deetra La’Rue

I’m a hopeless romantic, sometimes a little too hopeful, strung out on the idea of being in love.  There was a point in time in which I thought I was, but the idea quickly faded, soon after he did. I can remember experiencing what I thought to be my Prince Charming, however, he lacked the charm and was anything but royal. As a child, I’ve always been fond of fairytales, and found myself caught up in planning my own happy ending.  Cinderella and Ariel were two of my favorites to watch, but I didn’t like the fact that those Princesses didn’t look like me, in fact, none of them did. It wasn’t until I saw the Princess and the Frog, and finally realized that brown girls can be of royalty too!

I’ve been entangled in a couple of failed “situations”, in which I thought I had my knight and shining armor.  Even though they didn’t turn out as planned, I still raced to sleep at night. After my prayers and talk with God, I closed my eyes and watched the movie reel of my love life, but when I awakened, my fairy god-mother is nowhere to be found. But, I still continue to dream, because I know there is a man out there for me, and one day soon, I’m going to get my happy ending. I know that the cartoons and movies like to sell viewers what they call the “fantasy life”, because they think it’s the closest to what we’ll get to real.

Besides, they think a woman being “swept off her feet” is nothing but a figment of one’s imagination or just a really sweet “dream”. However, I know Kings and Queens do exist, and our significant other is waiting for the day we cross paths. Unfortunately for us, sometimes we allow our impatience to get the best of us, that we go seek the very thing or person, God says is supposed to find us. We’re exhausted, lonely, single and most of all, tired of watching others live happily ever after. Immediately, our thoughts begin to get the best of us, because we can’t understand why their dreams are coming true, and we’re still sound asleep.

Rather than sit still, we become huntsmen and lie in the cut, waiting to attack our prey. Days, months and years go by, and still no “kill”. The moment we give up is the moment we realize why we haven’t caught anyone…..it’s because WE ARE the prey! Men are supposed to hunt for us! In all honesty, that’s why a lot of times we experience some heartache and pain, is because we go and “find” the man we think is right for us, when he’s anything but. Dam*it, we want our happy ending, and we’ll do whatever it takes until we get it, except WAIT!

I know you may be lonely, in need of companionship, watching all your friends get married and have babies, but you can (and will) have it too! You’ve got to be faithful and know that God’s timing is going to be the right time for you! What you see others being blessed with, is because God said it’s their time. Don’t miss out on great opportunities or allow life to pass you by, because you’re too busy obsessing over finding the perfect man. I spent many if not all, of my twenties trying to “find” my husband, when I should’ve been trying to find myself!

I didn’t know who I was until I entered into my thirties, and I’m so finally happy to have met my acquaintance. Silly, right? In all reality, I’m so happy for this “alone time”, because I have so many business endeavors, PLENTY of time to write and work on my goals, as well as being able to travel and go as I please. Let’s be honest, if I were married or in a relationship with children, I wouldn’t be able to go so freely, because my time would have to be spread out equally. That’s why I don’t really stress about love anymore, because I know when the time is right, it’ll (he) find me! Ladies enjoy your me time and keep dreaming, because happy endings still come true!

Writefully yours,

Deetra La’Rue