Posted in humble

Help! I need to get down!

I suffer from extreme acrophobia! I don’t like ladders, climbing to high places or being up top (unless it involves success). I stay clear of anything that will take me out of my comfort zone, and place me in a position of fear, and pedestals are one of them. I appreciate when people recognize me and present me with accolades, but I don’t like the “hype” that comes along with it.

I don’t mean to sound ungrateful, but I just don’t like being placed above others. I don’t like when people make me out to be more than I am, because the minute I don’t live up to their expectations, I immediately fall from their graces. I used to try to impress people and live my life for them, but I realized that no matter how good I was to them or did what they wanted or expected of me, when I did anything unacceptable in their eyes (no matter how small it was), they turned on me.

This is one of the very reasons I DO NOT LIKE TITLES! I’ve been labeled as a role model, inspiring, encouraging and the list continues. Although I appreciate it all, I am human and I make mistakes, and will continue too, as long as I live. I’m not saying they are intentional, but what I am saying is, I’m not always going to get it right. I’m not always going to be everything to everybody or the “star”, as my church likes to put it. I don’t mind people looking up to me (no pun intended), I just don’t want the persecution that comes along with it.

I speak about my church a lot, because they are some of my biggest supporters. They brag on me constantly and have expectations for me, some which I’m pretty sure I haven’t met. However, even I have to tell them, “I’m terrified of heights, so NO pedestals please”! I’m just Deetra; a Christ lover and writer. It may not mean much to you, but those are the only two titles I’ll accept. People will hold you in high regards, and then drop you low, when they feel you don’t rise up to their expectations. Remember, those expectations are their feelings, don’t make them your own!

Until next time my NOTE takers!

Writefully yours,

Deetra La’Rue

Posted in humble

Success: When you don’t know how to feel!

I feel overwhelmed! I’m getting all the things I’ve always prayed to God for, but now I don’t know how to process it all. Everything that I’ve prayed years for, is happening so fast, literally right after another, and before I can enjoy one blessing, I’m met with another. This is NOT a complaint or an act of ungratefulness, because I’m sure there are countless of others praying for what I have. However, what do you do when you don’t know how to deal with your blessings? I’m very fortunate and grateful for all that God has bestowed upon me, but sometimes I struggle with them.

Sometimes I don’t feel like an accomplished Author and Writer, and no matter how often people remind me of my success, I just smile and say “thanks”. That’s not to say I’m not appreciative of God’s blessings, because I am. I wrote my first book in 2 days, my second book in 18 days and published both within 4 months of each other (If you are a writer, you know firsthand, this is UNHEARD of), and although I was extremely elated when I completed both and so very proud of myself, no more than a few days later, I felt as though I hadn’t really done anything. It seems the people around me are more proud of me and happy for me, than I am.

Before I published my second book, God blessed me with my very own business, CH1, and I had been praying and fasting to Him for years for that. When I finally got confirmation that it was going to come to fruition, I was so happy and felt extremely accomplished, when I received my business license. However, not even 24hrs later, I was back to feeling “normal”. “What dampened my mood”? I honestly couldn’t answer, let alone had a reason for it. To be honest, right now, I just don’t know how to feel. But, what I do know is, I gotta get a hand on this whole “success” thing…..really fast! I know I’ve got to make a quick adjustment, because God has revealed to me so many more blessings, for 2019 in particular.

When I look back over all that I’ve accomplished, I’m not sure if the reason I feel so “blah”, is because I sometimes feel as though I don’t deserve my blessings, or it could be due to the simple fact that I just don’t know how to process it all, nor do I want the attention that comes along with it. I do know, however, that I am extremely grateful and beyond blessed that God still hears and answers prayers. For all of my “note” takers, rest assured that God hears your prayers and will answer them, in HIS timing, not yours! Due understand that you need to be getting prepared and ready to receive everything that you have asked Him for and more!

Now my prayers have shifted to God, that once He answers them, He doesn’t allow me to become overwhelmed by them! Again, I’m grateful and thankful, but still trying to balance them all. Nonetheless, I know just how He continues to bless me, He’ll help me adapt as well….and He’ll do the same for you!

Until next time my “Note” takers!

Writefully yours,

Deetra La’Rue

Posted in humble

WARNING! Objects in mirror are closer than they appear

WARNING! This is NOT a test! 

My name is Deetra La’Rue and I am a HUGE pie lover! Two of the best pies I love to eat, are sweet potato pie and key lime pie. Although they are both delicious, neither can compare to my absolute favorite, “humble pie”. I used to fight my past and tried every way possible to keep others from knowing what really happened to me. I was embarrassed about my upbringing and fearful of how others would perceive me, let alone act towards me.  As I grew older, I no longer wrestled with the idea of what people thought of me, but more so what I thought of myself. I knew I wasn’t the first to encounter adversity and challenges, so suddenly, I didn’t feel the need to be ashamed.

I knew God was using my situation to benefit others, as opposed to bringing me out of mine. No matter how much I fantasized or dreamt of finally “making it”, one thing I’ve always remembered, is to remain humble.   I’ve read many rags to riches stories and was disgusted at the fact that many people quickly forgot where they came from, no sooner than God blessed them with what they have.  The rich persona they portray to others was an attempt to downplay the poor person they used to be, while leading people to believe they were always “about that life”. That ******* irritated me!   I’ve never been too keen on the idea of people placing themselves above others or at the top of the hierarchy to increase their self-esteem and appear impressive,to say the least.

“***** BE HUMBLE”

No matter how successful I become, I’ll always remember where I come from and what I come from. Although my past is in my rear view mirror, it reminds me that “objects in mirror are closer than they appear”. Those objects alone humble me, and can resurface at any moment in time, if we’re not careful of how we treat others and good stewards over what God has given us. I used to have aspirations of being this rich, superstar, but I never subscribed to the idea of being too big that others couldn’t touch me.  

Honestly, my true identity would battle the facade, and not allow me to become so full of myself. I’ve had many people try to place me atop a pedestal, but I quickly asked to be taken down.  I had to let them know, I’m not above anyone, and besides, I am terrified of heights! I wish more people were cognizant of their past, so they can better handle their future. It’s not to say they should be held hostage to it, but it would at least give them a sensitive heart and feelings on how to deal with people, who share the same background as them.  I understand that no one wants to be reminded of where they come from, but sometimes we need it to help remind us of who not to become.

I get it! Palatial pads are nice to come home to, luxurious cars are great to drive and designer handbags and accessories are cute to own, but none of it is more valuable than your ability to remain true to who you are, and not the person you want others to believe you to be.  My integrity, values and staying real (regardless of how ugly my past situation was), makes me richer than 14kt gold!

Because of God, I consider myself to be pretty successful. However, if I ever had the gall to feel or act as if I’m more or better than others, I’ll take a quick look in my rear-view mirror, smile and remember, “Objects in mirror are closer than they appear”!

Writefully yours, 

Deetra La’Rue