Today, I decided I was tired of pretending.
Pretending I didn’t care…..
Pretending I am strong…..
Pretending “it” didn’t bother me…..
Pretending “they” didn’t matter…..
Pretending that “words” don’t hurt me……
I was perfectly okay with living a lie, because it meant I didn’t have to face the truth…..or, the fact that it hurt! Majority of the posts I write are NOT for you, but me. I need the strength of my words to hold me up, when I can no longer do it myself. I tend to carry loads in excess of hurt, problems (most not my own) and pain, when I don’t have to. I’m (and you) very fortunate and blessed, to have someone graciously offer to carry my burdens for me, but I have to first be willing to give them up. Still thinking I’m made of steel, I continue to maintain my tough exterior and ability to withstand anything, when on the inside, I’m dying from everything. Will I survive? Where is the resilience I proudly boast of?
My cape is gone…..
My superpowers cease to exist…..
I am vulnerable, and it’s scary, because now I’m susceptible to EVERYTHING, when I told myself, I wasn’t. However, I have decided, that none of it matters…..because, I’m done pretending!
Be the reason for someone else’s strength…sometimes, it takes them seeing you do it, so they know it can be done!
Until next time my NOTE takers!